Love's Not Time's Fool

Eight is Great! We've been married for 8 months today. I know you are thinking, "This silly girl celebrates her marriage every stinkin' month!" Can you blame me? I married the best man in the whole wide world. 

When we first met other couples in Rexburg who had been married 6 months or longer we thought,  "They must know each other so well." Now we've surpassed the 6 month mark, but we still feel like babies getting to know each other. Sometimes we may drive each other nuts and climb up high objects to get away from each other, but we love being together. Speaking of being crazy, Lucas is a little creative about providing. He made our permaculture garden, wants to go pick huckleberries, and he wants to provide all the meat this year from his hunting dreams. I'm trying to be a good sport. I told him I'd cook whatever he brought home.

A few weeks ago as I was getting ready for the day, I almost grabbed his deodorant. He had been using mine, but finally purchased his own. At home I like wearing his gym shorts. I love my husband's good morning kisses and I wait anxiously for him to return home from work. I LOVE BEING MARRIED! 

Mary surprised me today by finishing the quilt she planned to give me for Christmas in 2011. She fits right into the Handy Family, so many projects, so little time. This finished levi quilt with all of her old jeans as a teenager is a sweet 8th month present because now I can have both hands in her jean pockets while I sleep too. 

Many folks warn couples that the first year of marriage is difficult. For us, it has been bitter-sweet. The only thing bitter about my marriage was leaving my mom, I am a momma's boy. Sweet, because Mary is my best friend. She understands me, she tunes me up, and she cares about me. I know that she will make a great momma... but not yet. She is mine to enjoy for a while longer. 

Some say that we are a perfect couple. However, Mary expresses deep feelings of inadequacy as a spouse. I have also been troubled by the many things that I need to do and become as a better spouse and a father. However, we build each other up, and work together to overcome our weaknesses and doubts. I memorized a poem at BYUI in a college poetry class. The sweet message it delivers paints our marriage: 

SONNET 116

Let me not to the marriage of true minds

Admit impediments. Love is not love

Which alters when it alteration finds,

Or bends with the remover to remove:

O no! it is an ever-fixed mark 

That looks on tempests and is never shaken;

It is the star to every wandering bark,

Whose worth's unknown, although his height be taken.

Love's not Time's fool, though rosy lips and cheeks 

Within his bending sickle's compass come: 

Love alters not with his brief hours and weeks, 

But bears it out even to the edge of doom.

   If this be error and upon me proved,

   I never writ, nor no man ever loved.

-Shakespeare 

Lucas Handy

Love's Reminders

A young boy gave me a little silver bell, and told me, "Ring this whenever you are lonely, and remember that God loves you." The following years I served a mission in a city of 11 million people, Sao Paulo, Brazil. The bell rang more than once my first year there. In the shadows of the concrete jungle, we taught a young woman who had once believed and faithfully followed Christ's gospel. She had even served a mission like the one I was serving. As I looked into her eyes, I could see her loneliness. She had followed a path that had brought her no joy. I pulled out my small bell the boy had given me, and rang it as loud as it could chime. Then told her of the love that God had for her and gave her the bell with the same instructions the little boy had given.

Ten years later, technology has advanced. I received a pop up message from this woman. She was proud to tell me of the positive changes she had made in her life. She then reminded me of my little bell. She had been re-baptized, and had even served another mission to Belo Horizonte, Brazil. As she thanked me, I could not accept it because it was the love of God that she felt through the ring of a bell and her choices to follow the path of joy.

To share joy brings joy. So I wasn't surprised when she told me she had given this bell to another in Belo Horizonte. Her sweet message reminded me of the joy that comes with sharing.God's love.

Life's questions, and paths are filled with distraction. Some say north, while others go south. Our own paths cross thousands of others each day. We see other's journeys in relation to our own or our neighbors and judge one another. Above the distractions, the Creator molds you and I and the earth of the paths... a Father who hopes we return to Him, even a God of perfect love. He alone knows your best choices and paths.

Sometimes life's journey has clarity in directions each choice has a destiny. So it has been with me this year... a marriage, change in a career, and a new home. Mary is eleven years younger than I, and many laughed and doubted our love. As I listened to the distraction, I had decided twice against dating her. The truest advice was sent from above and filled my heart to help me know that I should marry Mary. Once again the sweet knowledge that the path I travelled was right.

I complained, and hoped for my career to get better to help me begin my life with Mary. Rexburg is not D.C. full of jobs I'd qualify for. Some told me to settle for whatever job I could get. I felt within a promise of something better. Six months have passed and I am earning, enjoying, and learning more than I ever could have with the other job offers and my previous position. Once again, the love from above spoke to my heart. Not logic, persuasion or another one's path. The Creator of all things blessed my life's journey.

Nobody is alone in life's paths and choices. I am proud to see my brother Clayton happy in Chico, California with his perfect job at Berberian Nuts. He left Logan, Utah less than a month ago as his heart and he chose to take his family to this new place. With no job arranged, enough money saved to cover a months rent, and the confidence that came from this heartfelt direction; he moved his wife and three kids to Chico. He has two bachelor degrees. One in business, and another in Forestry/Horticulture. Within the first couple days serendipity guided his path to meet the Director of HR and the General Director of a large orchard. Now he is employed with a house on the walnut orchard, a company vehicle, and a salary with benefits working as a professional! Congrats!

Life's journey can be full of His divine love. As we walk our paths may we ring our bell louder to help others along their paths. While examining another's journey, may we accept them with that same little chime. As we walk forward may we persistently seek for divine guidance along the way... He will guide us if we listen. When we review our live's journey, may we see His rich blessings and know that God loves us.


Prepared by Lucas Handy

Tallest Peaks Still Lie Ahead

I saw Mary cry uncontrollably. I tried to calm her down by giving her a hug, but she snapped back, "Don't Touch Me or I'll Fall." She froze on the cornice of Mount Borah, the tallest mountain of Idaho. It just happened to be the worst part of our climb. She froze next to the mountains edge which fell a couple thousand feet in a steep decline. She could not move and cried harder with each gust of wind. It was a little spooky. There was a thunder storm just north of the peak, and the cold wind hit us like waves which helped cause vertigo. All along I had planned to make it to the top. However, we passed a dozen hikers on their way down and most of them had not made it. After this incident, Mary forbid me of climbing alone, so maybe next time.

Mary's father also made the ascent with us, but turned around just before the cornice and ridge, often called chicken out ridge. His ranches and cabins, Antelope Creek Cabin and Pioneer Home are about 45 minutes from this hike. He is old enough to be retiring, but instead has invested in some ranches when he was bought out from the Webb Basin Dairy Farm. Mary has eight brothers, that I am sure will enjoy being on the ranch at some point in their lives. As for Mary and I, it is an awesome getaway!

Clayton and Jenna also climbed another peak. My brother Clayton, a recent biology graduate and tree specialist, worked with an arborist in Logan for a few months. Suddenly, his hands started hurting and became numb. The doctors said he had a bad case of tendinitis, and needed to take 6-8 weeks off from using his hands. In the meantime, Jenna had already been accepted to graduate school in Chico, California for Marriage and Family Counseling. After serious prayer and meditation, they decided to move to Chico. Within a week, they were hundreds of miles further from our love cottage in Rexburg, Idaho. We admire their bold move, but will miss them deeply. He already has a few job options, his favorite lead is a large orchard that the Church owns in Chico. We love you, and wish you luck on this next mountain. Dad taught us how to work, mom taught us how to look good. So you are set.   

Some people say that I am the gatekeeper of my destiny. This may be the healthiest way to encourage personal accountability and action. However, there are powers greater than any individual. Some people also believe that people generally stay the same. In my life, close friends have helped me grow in many ways. Many wonderful things have happened as a result of their influence or serendipity. My heart overflows with sweet memories engraved from these experiences. Many of them have changed my destiny through.

Yesterday while volunteering in the Rexburg temple. I ran into family of two old friends, and then received a linkedin request from an old friend’s mother. This left me thinking about those who have helped me become a better person. It was fun to think about how similar family members behave and interact with others.

Mr. Seely, Kate’s grandpa was volunteering with us. He was married at 28 after serving in World War 2, and serving a mission for the Church. His wife wanted to serve a mission, but the church leaders postponed for a few months… until he decided to propose. Shortly thereafter he was selected and agreed to serve as a bishop for 12 years. He is 92 now still volunteering and serving those around him. His example fits Kate because she is a stalwart, serving individual Then I had a brief discussion with Brad Carmack’s little sister, who will be graduating soon. Brad is a BYU friend from Meridian that we shared fun memories. Earlier, I received a Linkedin invite from Nadine Kloepfer, Kelsey’s mom. I actually ran into Kelsey a few months ago while servicing my car in Idaho Falls. We dated for a summer years ago. She is happily married now with her own little family.

The last ten years have been filled with friendships with some of the best people I know.  Each of you has shaped my life for the better. You have helped me learn more about myself, and you have helped to become the person that I have needed to become for this beautiful relationship of marriage, which now flourishes. Each of you is amazing, and you have good families and influences that have helped you become who you are. Wish my wife luck now because she is the one who will help me to become the person that I should. I know that each of you will become excellent spouses, and parents when you would like this to happen.

While looking back at the experiences that I have had with all of my friends, I love your jovial spirits. You have made this world a welcoming home for me. You are throughout the states, the Americas, Eurasia, and Africa. Even in the Pacific Islands, we share fond memories. You have made this world a small place. The world is now my home.

 Everything that we do will affect someone. Those that have planted the seeds before us have planted the seeds of our successes. Everything that we do touches those who around us, or those who will follow. I am glad to be a part of this home with you, and hope that today you and I choose to become friends with one another and influence each other to become better.  

Love, Lucas  

Prepared by Lucas Handy